Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Background Checks (BONUS Foreground Check!)

previous post: Monday Morons



  1. Yes, yes, it’s taaaaacky. But god DAMN, that guy has a hot body.

  2. Unbelievably lame but the “BONUS” made me laugh.

  3. Oooo, yes he does have a hot body. I love when they pull their pants down just right there.

    What’s with the funeral one? “Whoops, dead body in frame!”??

  4. But the first one has a Superman tattoo. That is terrible and cancels out any points he wins for the hot body.

  5. Mmmm, catheterised penis.

  6. What a pity his name is Brock and he looks like he eats roadkill.

  7. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    The funeral photo is the odd one out as it doesn’t have a caricature of a dick in it. Brock’s abs are bigger than his pectorals, “Superchump”.

  8. The body is okay. To bad it’s been tainted with the face only a mother could love and a tattoo only a former stripper with a playboy tattoo on her stomach by the c section scar named candy could find “sooo hawttt”

  9. what IS is with the public bathroom photos? i usually just want to get the hell out of there as fast as i can, not pose for a facebook photo.

  10. ThinkingInPictures

    I gotta go with gingivitis on this one… Unfortunately a giant Superman S on the chest pretty much cancels out any hotness that was spared by the “Oh, my goodness, there’s a mirror right where I’m casually leaning while not flexing every muscle in my body. I had no idea” pose

  11. that guy has like 1% body fat, I’d destroy his ribs with a swift right hook

  12. When taking a picture at a funeral, are you supposed to smile?

  13. Haha – it looks like they can’t quite decide. They are working the Mona Lisa smile…
    The last one looks like a party I want to be at. Penis drink. Check. Giant teddy. Check. Man in weird romper suit. Check. ‘Cool’ green lighting. Check. What’s not to love?

  14. DivineMonkeyTrigger

    Ben, you’d miss his ribs (he had them removed, for personal reasons) and punch him straight in his hunky heart. And mistermessy, if I were at Brock’s funeral, I’d struggle not to smile. Wow, I have a lot of hate for our buff Ansel Adams protege.

  15. That first guy is going to have a really tough time when he gets older and his body deteriorates while his ego stays the same. That tattoo will look great on a nice full set of man boobs, though.

  16. Oh Brock, can we just lock you in a room so humanity never has to deal with you ever again? Please?

  17. The bathroom photos are annoying – I know I’ve been blocked in by several of them when I just wanna get back out to the people that are actually having fun, instead of trying to look like they are having a “like, oh my god, totally awesome” time in the bathroom.

    Did they tag the dead person, and then set that as the dead person’s display pic?

  18. Eh.

  19. Talk about a learning experience for the little girl in # 3.

  20. What’s with the Superman tattoo in the first one? What a nob.

  21. I wonder if they tagged Jesus…

  22. who brings a camera to a funeral?

  23. #1 – who takes a pic in a gay bath house???

    #2 – so this isn’t the Tanner wedding?

    #3 – That girl’s mother wins Parent of the Year award.

    #4 – I like Furries too.

  24. That hottie was probably in the gym’s shower/restrooms.

  25. Meeh, he’s okay. I actually prefer guys with a little more fat. Slim, but not super muscular. Why do women want to crawl into bed with such a hard surface? (no pun intended)

    Also, his name is Brock.

  26. ThinkingInPictures

    Also, I think the bar in number three is just outside of my hometown… If it’s the one I’m thinking of, idiots bringing their kids is definitely not unheard of. Especially if this is old and taking place during bar league volleyball or softball season.

    My fav bar kid encounter at that place has to be the time some 6-year-old ran up while we were playing pool and shoved most of the balls (including the 8) down the holes. The mother then proceeded to yell at us when we got annoyed and told the kid to get off the table. Apparently we were asshats because her precious little monster was “just playing around”

  27. lol

  28. Mr 6 pack is reflecting… if he doesn’t keep up the workouts, his future is behind him.

  29. I don’t find it soooo trashy that so many pene are floating around what seems to be a few different bachelorette party shots; what does seem super trashy is to bring the kid to the party. Was the baby daddy not available to sit with the spawn? Oh, wait…

    The funeral pic thing really isn’t unusual at all, especially in Asian cultures or cultures / families where death isn’t the ultimate enemy and end of everything. That said, I was still super horrified when Mom started snapping pics of Grandpa as a stiff.

    @stanselmdoc, They’re fun to bounce around on for a little while, but you gotta do all the work. Plus, it’s just annoying when they talk. ;D

  30. lol, so he’s actually a deep and thoughtful guy? Might explain why he’s frowning…

  31. I think they are trying not to smile because they do not want anyone to know that they finally killed the abusive husband of the woman on the right.

  32. I think I work with those people at the funeral.

    Hmm a Dildo gun. That might be entertaining.

  33. The first one would have been lamebook worthy even without fatty in the background.

  34. Brock has ‘Jimmy’ tattoed on his right arm- maybe its his man friend 😉

  35. @Dees Nuts #23

    I don’t think it’s a gay bath house, I’ve never seen anyone that good looking in one. Usually they’re like the one in the background.

  36. Nice Tim. Glad to get an informed opinion on gay bath houses. :p

  37. I don’t get why everyone is ragging on Brock. He walked in to a men’s restroom with no shirt on, casually minding his own business, when suddenly he caught sight of something out of the corner of his eye. He pulled his trusty iPhone quick as a flash and finally got the proof he needed to prove to the world that Bizarro Brock really does exist.

  38. I wonder if the background on #1 was on purpose… just to make himself look better. He must have forgotten about his tattoos.

  39. hahaha the funeral one is fuckin brilliant

  40. i’m embarrassed to say… that i have taken pics at a funeral before.. i didn’t realize it was tacky… i feel so lamebooked…

  41. #34 – where does it say Jimmy?

    and what do you take photos of at a funeral?

  42. My parents are from Ireland, and I was raised in Boston, it was never an oddity to see children in pubs. And I think something worse than public bathroom pics is when you go to a club/bar and some girl(s) ask you to take a pic for them. That really annoys me, I just want to pee and go back to my beer wtf.

  43. Damn, I can’t stop staring at number one…order up please. 😉

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