Friday, January 13, 2012

Economizing the Friend Zone

previous post: Thanks Dad



  1. Just because a guy is nice to me doesn’t mean I have to suck his dick. You’re friendzoned because you’re a whiny horndog who isn’t nice because you’re nice, you’re nice because you want something in return. And don’t act like guys do the same thing…pass over girls who like them for girls with giant cans.

  2. Sounds like you got small cans boomstick, so you better start sucking the nice guys, because in a few years, the only ones being nice to you will be your cats.

  3. young girls dont want nice guys because they’er all dramatic bitches. Dating a nice guy who treats you right is boring because then they have nothing to complain about their dickhead boyfriend. I feel like its a self fulfilling prophecy. Girls are used to hearing other girls go on about their dickhead boyfriends so they want to do the same. So they need to friendzone the nice guys so they have more people to complain to, and they need to date the douches so they have more to complain about.

    With facebook, we live in a very “brag about how bad your life is” society really. We all know 20 people whose facebook feeds are just bitchy rants over and over with the occasional “such a beautiful day out today!!” followed by “god its so hot my vag is sweating like a pigs, I hate this shit”

  4. I for one never cared about the size of a woman’s breasts or hindparts, as long as the latter were not absurdly large.

  5. All this coming from an anal rapist…

  6. exactly, I’m a licensed analyst and therapist, I’d say I’m an expert

  7. lmao.. i have to agree with iddjit. better get to suckin boomstick!

  8. and id hate to have a therapist who goes by the name “analrapist”.. even if it is only on

  9. Women, stop sitting back quietly and making men do all the work. If you like a guy, ask him out. If more of you took risks, more of us would too.

  10. I partially agree with Christopher, but only when they complain that they never get asked out, and not just the ugly ones.

  11. Christophers contept sadly does not work for us. It is in use in Sacandinavan countries – in the bar you see almost just woman starting the flirt. That leads to man not starting flirting ever….

  12. I did not ignore a nice guy once. He claimed to be one, at least. However, he wasn’t – he just used “the nice guy”-image to get sympathy so that he could get girls interested in a dominant and selfish guy that totally had his head up his ass. Still looking for the truly nice guy…

    And yes Aveirulz, in Scandinavia, girls do the first move very often. I’m Norwegian, I know.

  13. Women seem to prefer men who belittle them, tell them they are overweight, and ogle their friends, whilst obsessing over sport and ignoring them.
    Men seem to prefer women who are vacuous, vain, and with large mammary glands, over women with real substance.
    Sad but true!

  14. Boomstick is correct. And yes, I am a woman with rather small boobs, but I’ve had my normal share of boyfriends. Guys, If you really liked someone, you would man up and ask them out. It’s true that most “nice” guys are just nice to any girl with the hope they will finally get laid until someone takes the bait.

  15. Holy fuck. To all you wet, sad losers who don’t know how to approach someone:- I hope you never do, because I hope you never breed.

  16. Holy Fuck Ms Anne, STFU. Every time I actually read the comments you put up the most annoying drivel imaginable. Do everyone a favor and take a break.

  17. No Kardashians for you, mad2?

    There are two kinds of nice guys: nice and normal- which is very hard to find, and nice but weird- shirt tucked into jeans, can’t hold a normal conversation that isn’t about their area of expertise, strange etiquette, overpraises you, thinks a first date equals a relationship…pheew! I could go on.

    Unless I find “nice and normal,” I’m steering clear of nice. The latter group really creeps me out.

  18. suck it, cartman.

  19. Why’s it so embarrassing to ask out the girl you like? Just fucking get on with it you pussies. If they say no, at least you can say you tried.

  20. I was one of those “nice guys” back in school. I never backed down from asking a girl out and dated often, BTW.
    I lost one to a bad boy once, who she married, and it broke my heart. 25 years later I found her again…she is on her third husband (two killed themselves) with a kid by each and has herpes (which she tried to give to me). I on the other hand found a nice plumpkin with average sized breasts and have been married to only her for those same 25 years.
    Stay nice be genuine and just ask her out.
    Oh, and I found over the years that most women want money.

  21. If a woman wants money, tell her to go earn it herself.

  22. Women don’t like jerks. Women like men who are confident enough to make the first move. If the “nice guys” would stop with the “but if I make the first move I’ll look like a male chauvinist pig” nonsense and actually say “I like you and want to see if we can turn like into love” first then they’d get more dates.

    Confidence is sexy, men. Guys who sit around waiting for women to make the first move always end up alone.

  23. @jamisings: no, women just want to make sure the guys actually really like them, as they know that a few days/weeks/years from now, what they call “love” would actually have gone away and they are likely to be dumped like shit. Nothing related to confidence.
    See, I wouldn’t make the first move with you.

  24. My wife made the first move with me. I guess I’m just that sexy.

  25. @ jamisinger, I think that you are correct. Confidence is huge.
    BTW, 87% of the women in America will not make a first move.
    One of the big problems is that once the guy has made the move it would be nice if the girl actually played and didn’t watch. So many women seem to expect the man to make the next five or ten moves too.

  26. Either that, Mad, or she was just that desparate.

    My confidence is the reason my wife even had any interest in me to begin with. I approached her. Ten years and three kids later, we’re pretty happily married.

  27. I don’t think I’d want to be any closer than the “friend zone” with someone that uses the term “man up”!

  28. Desperate? She is offended… our seventh anniversary approaches, by the way. And 10th of being together.

    Perhaps your wife just didn’t know how to turn you down without hurting your feelings so she unhappily went along with your overtures out of pity and has been keeping up appearances ever since then.

    Or perhaps judging relationships based on who made the first move is stupid.

  29. I think we now need

  30. Testy that one is. Rawr!

  31. Jesus H. Christ; dating advice from the comments section of Lamebook. Good luck with that.

    For those people without Adblock, there are some really useful links to “What You Should Never Say To Your Girl” and “Make Her Cream For You Every Time” towards the top of this page…

  32. I made the first move. She did not know how to take it. So I taught her.

  33. bacchante: I don’t know what’s worse 🙂 dating advice OR bragging about one’s marriage. Anyway that was painful to read.

  34. Indeed. And nauseating.

  35. I made it interesting to read by imagining some details about their spouses.
    Beatus’ wife has a severe intellectual impairment from when she signed up for experimental drug trials in college and is borderline autistic; and mad’s wife is a mail-order bride from Serbia with a simmering hatred of western culture and a hare-lip.
    see? isn’t it interesting now?

  36. oh, and only one of beatus’ kids is really his.

  37. Damn you, Anne! But I find myself laughing anyway. Mean, untrue, and rather funny.

  38. Sometimes guys just want to explain that they are friendzoned because girls just likes jerks, instead of looking into mirror. Just for example, I have some “firendzoned” guys, which are my friends but nothing more (thought they wanted to be more), one alcoholic, one is chauvinistic (no one can stand those women belongs to kitchen etc jokes all the time, those kind of jokes doesn’t make you attractive, just for advise), one is a cheater and one is very arrogant and elitist, and the last one is a dumb racist. And they almost all thinks that they don’t have girlfriends just because they are too nice. I can be more or less friends with them (some are good friends of mine), but nothing more, and that is not because I like jerks, because I do not.

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