Friday, February 1, 2013

Pee Probs

previous post: Bee Brave



  1. I literally just crapped my pants because if you really want people to know your pain you crap. Peeing is for pussies.

  2. If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis.

  3. I would love to know what this person’s “problems” are. Ask any person in your Facebook friend list, and I guarantee they will have had strife and pain in their lives at some point, the difference being that most people have the modesty not to whore themselves for attention at every chance. In fact, its usually the quiet ones that are going through the most shit. I would defriend anybody that made a post like this, its pathetic.

  4. if this guy really wants people to stop messing with his emotions, then peeing your pants and posting about it isn’t going to get people to stop.

    @3 oooohhhh! that was the grossest thing i’ve ever heard in my life! let’s go!

  5. This guy is so edgy.

  6. Yeah that should do it, I’m sure no will mess with ole pee pants anymore.

  7. Just shut up and kill yourself already.

  8. Maybe you should try crying. That usually works.

  9. Are you serious, people? This guy is literally crying for help. Most people who commit suicide make their feelings known before they do it. Unfortunately, people frequently don’t take them seriously.

    I really REALLY hope someone can get him some help before he kills himself. He does not need a lamebook post, he needs a psychiatrist. Fast.

  10. The_Un-Cool_Scene

    I just…I don’t get it. How on Earth does pissing your self make you feel better/less sad? I hope this person is A) being sarcastic or B) gets the help they obviously need.

  11. I would bet anything this is a teenage girl. What makes me so frustrated is that so many teenagers and young adults now are so self involved that they honestly think that everyone needs to stop their lives because you’re not happy with your own. Instead of crying out for attention because of your depression, you have to take a moment to think about what is really making you unhappy about yourself and make an honest attempt to fix it, and if you can’t there are tons of people who are willing to help, like counselors, teachers, parents. But no one can make another person happy, its all within your own head and you have to find a way out. Sorry this is so long, but I’ve dealt with depression for years and finally found the way to be happy and positive and actually DEAL with what was making me depressed…

    TL;DR? Stop posting cries for attention on facebook (and peeing your pants then telling everyone about it) and realize you’re your own problem and fix it.

  12. Pants aren’t wet

  13. I farted the other day and had shit came out.

    last time I force a fart out

  14. If you want to show how sad you really are then pee in a better looking pair of pants.


    I just jerked off in a sock because I don’t know how to deal with my sadness any more.

    I just slapped a monkey because I don’t know how to deal with my indigestion any more.

    I just farted in the face of a priest, because I don’t know how to deal with my happiness….

  16. Virgin post:
    Pee-lease get help!

  17. I don’t know about anyone else, but I find it very hard to urinate off-toilet. Kudos to the OP.

  18. I just got an iphone 5 and I’m sad because the cunt of a thing doesn’t adjust the size of the page being viewed. Instead of this page being displayed in full iphone5 glory, I have a half an inch of black at the top and bottom of the screen. fml.

  19. Next in line to shoot up a school. Get the net.

  20. Mrsrckstr, way back in antefacebookian times, when I was a teenage girl, I was a depressed, suicidal cutter. My biggest problem was my parents beating on me (I’m deaf in one ear from one such beating),and generally making my life a fucking misery. I suppose that I could have put a bit more effort into fixing my problems, but that would have just resulted in a different set of problems, vis-a-vis some serious prison time.

  21. I cry for you, but my tears are from laughter.

  22. I have Android so I’m not too familiar with Apple, but have you tried another browser besides Safari, Jenny? Like, Chrome or Atomic? Usually browsers, even the default one that’s installed allows you to change your display settings. Give chrome a shot. Every time I open a page it’s sized to fit the screen. I also have it on landscape only because of the increased page width.

  23. Rattus, I too was a teenage girl before social networking, and I understand your situation. Like I said, in those instances, I wish that you had someone to go to, like a school counselor. I had similar issues, but it was emotional not physical. It took me until my late 20s, but I finally got help. Its out there for everyone.

  24. #10 actually, yeah people make their feelings known all the time.
    The difference is, that’s not when you should be most worried about them committing suicide. (Key word: most)
    What more commonly happens is they all of a sudden have a sense of peace because they feel they’ve found a solution to their problem.
    So when you see a person who’s depressed all the time suddenly become relaxed or “at peace” for no apparent reason , THAT is when it’s most likely.

    Btw it’s hard to take you seriously when your name is “ttsuck” 😀

  25. thanks Jacques, but I’m on the lamebook app.

  26. I have a feeling it’s more like the poster peed on accident and just decided to make an event of it.

  27. Dardarbrinks, I agree name ‘ttsuck’ (short for table tennis sucks) makes it difficult for people to take you seriously. Ans that’s because I did not intend to make a serious statement on this website, which I visit occasionally for fun and to get a few laughs, thereby alleviating stress.

    Unfortunately, and unexpectedly, I see something which really may not be a laughing matter. I know for a fact that if this person were to be in a physician’s office next day and recite what s/he did, and the physician did not ask whether s/he was suicidal, he would be liable for malpractice.

    Behold this: “The patients who made serious suicide attempts but survived tended to be younger (17-35), and to display depressive symptoms such as feelings of worthlessness, helplessness, hopelessness, global or partial insomnia; anxiety and panic episodes; anergia and severe anhedonia. Other predictive indicators included: recent severe interpersonal conflict, loss of an important relationship…..”

  28. Suck it up, bitch. Actually, mop it up first.

  29. I remember back when lamebook was about making 10000 thousand of dollars on my laptop at home and not about trying to help the sad people who are featured here.

  30. Whoops! Lol
    I thought it meant “titty suck”

  31. ^Pervert! 😛

  32. Dear lord, what has happened to this place? Lamebook is here so we can laugh at these freaks and attention seekers, but now it seems some bleeding hearts type is always inclined to pop up and defend the attention seeking moron in the spotlight.

    This idiot doesn’t need a psychiatrist or a doctor, they need to stop being an attention craving pussy and have a shot of real life. No, they’re not going to kill themselves, the response from TTsuck is just the kind of thing the original poster would have been looking for.

    Strap on a pair.

  33. Abraham Lincoln, I hope nobody says that if any of your relatives are ever in this unfortunate situation. Growing a pair should not translate into medieval barbarianism whereby you yell and applaud whence people are being tortured and hanged. Well next logical step after this post would be a picture of someone slicing his/ her wrists and everyone taunting and laughing at the person. Or laughing at the posts of children dying of cancer, because bald is funny. Depression, like cancer, is a disease and needs therapy.

    Consider this news (this site is not very charitable about posting links): Shortly before committing suicide yesterday, a Michigan woman went on her Facebook page and penned a farewell note stating that “i can’t handle this shit anymore,” and that her pain was “too strong…to handle any longer.”

    You can find several similar unfortunate news.

    Another suicide “On Dec. 24, Colvin wrote a cryptic post that read only, Tomorrow is Christmas ……………………. :(. When a couple of people asked about the sad face at the end of the text, Colvin apparently entered: “something im (sic) trying to deal with on my own right now.”

    Finally, this professional opinion: “NEVER ASSUME THAT SOMEONE JUST WANTS ATTENTION, or is “threatening” suicide. People who commit suicide usually talk about it first. They are in pain and often reach out for help because they do not know what to do and have lost hope. All suicide attempts must be treated as though the person has the intent to die. Your attention may well save a life. Always take talk about suicide seriously. Always.”

    If it makes me a bleeding heart, I’m glad about it because I’m then doing justice to not only my profession, but being a human being.

  34. I don’t know what to do and I’m always in the dark. We’re living in a powder keg and giving off sparks.


  36. ttfuck, op, and rattus: do evolution a favour and kill yourselves already. survival is for the fittest.

  37. two words: POE’S LAW.

    that’s all.

  38. Anyone who pisses themselves and then posts about it on social media needs to be put into secure hospitalisation…. This person CLEARLY needs psychiatric help…

  39. Seriously what did happen to lamebook? We’re here for laughs not pity.

    And if people wanna post depressing shit and kill themselves afterwards then so be it.

    Hooray Darwinism!!

  40. If this is serious, this kid needs help. This shouldn’t be on lamebook, it should be sent to that kid’s parents.

  41. @40 No shit. Lamebook used to have the funniest comments now it’s filled with a bunch of hipsters crying about this kid’s feelings.

    Hey guys, rather than posting advice to a kid that’s not going to fucking read it, you can do us all a favor and just post nothing. If you kids actually gave a shit you would make an effort to find the kid to give him some help, but apparently all anyone here is capable of doing is bitching about it in lamebook comments and giving us sage wisdom on the effects of depression.

    I don’t fucking care about this drama queen, but at least I have the balls to admit it rather than pretending I do by posting all of these babbling wanna be a counselor comments.

    Now click the downvote because this is the post that has me convinced that lamebook comments aren’t even remotely funny anymore. Oh and also to tell yourself you’re a good person, because showing your dissatisfaction with my opinion is all it takes these days.

  42. Look, what happened is that some emotionally stunted jerkwad thought that this picture was funny and posted it. Once it was posted, the grownups in the room, the ones who have lost loved ones to suicide or who have been that low themselves at one point, said “no, this isn’t funny, this is a serious sign of mental illness.” If you think this is funny, then you are lacking in maturity and life experiences. Hopefully you will grow up one day.

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