Tuesday, June 19, 2012

50 Shades of Family

previous post: I used to drive a cab…



  1. I got a kick out of this one. Crazy moms are awesome.

  2. I agree! Crazy moms are awesome, especially the ones who stay current and aren’t over the top embarrassing to their kids.
    However, 50 Shades of Grey is probably the most poorly written and badly researched bunch of froofrah I have read in a long while. Amateurish I thought, but hey that’s just me and I don’t have the parts so couldn’t say if it would give me an erection or not.

  3. I fucked Norma. She was a MILF.

  4. Or maybe just a MIF

  5. Why would people read Fifty Shades of Gray? It’s Twilight fanfic! Fanfic is stupid. Twilight is stupid. Twilight fanfic is the epitome of desperate, lame, and pathetic imaginations (or lack thereof). The fact that this book series is a best seller makes me want to kick puppies.

  6. Good point jacqbone, it seems there’s a lot of simple minded people around these days, likely inspired by empty headed celebrities. And to think this is the supposed ‘Age of Information’, clearly not exclusively!

    I urge you not to punish innocent mammals for this abomination though, instead join the remainder of educated consumers who appreciate and support more enlightened stories. I just purchased another Dickens classic the other day, and to think it was published 152 years ago!

    Will FSoG ring familiar in people’s minds even 1 year from now? I leave you to consider.

  7. You abbreviated “Fifty Shades of Grey?”

  8. you say ‘you don’t have the parts’, teeko, yet you are a giant cock.
    so how does that work?

  9. If you don’t know how one works, I think maybe you should go have a talk with mommy and daddy.

  10. oh, i am familiar with the workings of the male generative member.
    you, on the other hand, resemble the male generative member.

    did you not get that? I called you a dick.

  11. #7: Yes beatus, you are correct!

    Any reason why you put into question that which you already knew?

  12. ^to illustrate just quite how much of tragic cunt you are, one would presume.

  13. Ah thank you Anne, that clarifies what I sought to know completely, without any ambiguity whatsoever.

  14. ^you like that word, don’t you?

  15. Oops, you didn’t tell me which word you’re referring to silly!

  16. if you can’t do any better than that bullshit, I’m going to have to pop you on ignore. because you’re not worthy.

  17. Norma is horny as hell.

  18. this is just not awkward anymore. cool your moms on your facebook.

  19. I can’t believe that so many women are basically getting off on domestic abuse. It’s insane!

  20. #11: It was rhetorical, kind of wondering exactly how familiar you are with the book, despite claims to the contrary. I, for one, had never even heard of the book until this Lamebook post.

  21. #19 Are you kidding? Women LOVE that kinda shit…don’t let ’em fucking telling you otherwise. Here’s some advice for any listening eyes…next time she (or any woman, for that matter) mouths off to you just shove a dirty sock in her mouth and stick it in her ass…she might try and pull away, but don’t worry, TRUST ME, shes enjoying it just as much as you are, if not more…and after you’re both done just see if she has anything else to fucking say to you…if she does, rinse and fucking repeat, she’s clearly into it.

  22. ^how’s the job hunt coming along, capn?

  23. The job hunt eh? Shit if you ask me…at this rate I’ve considered taking the first piss-poor minimum wage job offered just to get some cash and open up the opportunity of finding something farther away.

  24. ^wherever you go, there you’ll be.

  25. how uhh…insightful there, Ms.

  26. I’m fucking deep, man. I really am.

  27. #20: Reasonably familiar beatus, after all the book is in every store at the moment and I heard it broke the record for fastest selling, previously set by Harry Potter series. I guess you’ve just been living in a cave recently?

  28. normaisnotnormal

    My name is Norma… I’m taking this post as a hint that I should get off the computer and do something productive.

  29. #27: Books aren’t very newsworthy in my little corner of the world. Instead, they just talk about the different ways people kill each other around here. Fifty Shades of Grey seems rather interesting, though. What is it about?

  30. If you can imagine a story written by a virgin school girl who only dreamt what a dom/sub relationship might be like, but how she eventually turns the dom into a whipering little gentle boy who only partly plays rough in this amazing but little used torture room he has, that is pretty close.
    Imagine also that it’s poorly written, the main female character acts like an innocent, but the guy who is smitten with her and abused as a child is RICH I tells, ya, RICH, but it’s packaged up to be some new exciting series for people who have maybe out-grown Harlequin Romance, but aren’t ready for anything beyond wrists bound with silk ties.
    Trash I tell you. Unmitigated trash

  31. ^it’s Dom/sub, n00b. they take that shit very seriously.

  32. No, we don’t.

  33. ^n00b

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