Tuesday, November 16, 2010

A Schnappy Status

previous post: Brighter Lights



  1. jizzelle!

  2. Jizzelle is one seriously unfortunate name.

  3. I’m dreading the day when i have to tell my eldest daughter that she was the result of five E’s, six lines of coke, a case of mistaken identity and a slight misunderstanding / garbling of the phrase ‘Don’t spunk in me! Don’t spunk in me!’

  4. Gisèle in french is a very beutiful name!

    But Jizzele? Really people? Kids around the world are already hiding in shame with last names like Hiscock etc… Why would you purposely name you’re kid Jizz…

  5. @Bucket, I agree with your whole comment.
    Mary needs to die. Fucking horrible mom should have drank herself to death if she’s going to be that irresponsible.

  6. Jizz probably means nothing in Brazil

  7. What respectable women drinks peppermint schnapps before being date raped, honestly?

  8. Gisele is a pretty common name in Brazil, she just has an odd way of spelling it.

  9. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Jizzelle sounds like a good name for a porn actress who only does Bukkake.

  10. Damn it. Dukey beat me to the good comment.

  11. I love Mary Kelly T. A day with peppermint schnapps is always good for making babies ( and really for anything)

  12. slicingupeyeballs

    Um, Mary K, I don’t think it was only the schnapps, pretty sure there was some diddle involved…

    and maybe Jizzelle is a nickname, she may just be a girl called Elle who really enjoys facials…?

  13. Bucket, yes, I should’ve specified that Jizzelle is a horrible SPELLING of the name.

  14. I would like to point out that nothing in the above comment indicates that Mary Kelly is Jizzelle’s mother, only Jordan’s.

  15. A nice little conversation going on between friends, and then mum has to stick her ear in. Parents are an embarrassment. They should all be banned from facebook.

  16. Slappy, did I miss something…..? Who said Mary K was Jizzelle’s mom?

  17. I thought Keona did and that then there was a follow comment. In review though I could have been mistaken.

  18. i don’t know why that’s such a “holy fuck mom” moment, and sharing the part about drinking schnapps, well, who really cares. the whole post is about your parents’ sex life together, but when a parent actually corrects their assumptions it’s a OMG no way!

    basically, so fucking what.

  19. I think it’s nice that she waited until St. Patrick’s Day to get trashed, spread her legs and poke a hole in the condom. You can’t give all the goodies out just because men are giving into commercialized holidays.

  20. LOL….atleast Lamebook didn’t edit it this time. This was GOLD.

  21. If any of my girls complained about how they were conceived, I’d mumble something incoherent and impregnate one of their friends again. Blood/stone, and all.

  22. @4, my mother, who was a teacher, once had a new student named Shithead (pronounced Shi-tayed). At least those who see Jizzelle’s name in writing will pronounce it correctly right off the bat. Poor Shithead…

  23. That’s Jordan’s mom, not Jizzelle’s. Jordan is her babydaddy, and she makes up these statuses to post herself for the attention.

  24. Nothing does point to the idea that Mary may be Jizzelle’s mom as well, but… then why does she have her friend’s mom friended? o.O Your own parents/aunts/uncles I can see but… your friends’ parents too? *shrug* Anything’s possible though I suppose.

  25. Ughhhh Jordan is my babydaddy? what? LOL ok then. It’s actually Jordan’s Mom, and i think that friends of friends can comment on your stuff, it’s not about me, the burn on Jordan was just TOO GOOD not to post. Haters gon hate <3

  26. I can’t believe nobody realized that if your birthday is in Feb… you were conceived in may. So this entire post is rendered stupid.

  27. look at the date in the FB post. now who’s rendered stupid?

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