Thursday, March 10, 2011

Little Problems…

previous post: What the Folk!



  1. Fucking hell, bring back the wanking jokes, all is forgiven.

  2. Paranoid I know what you mean. How could they stoop so fucking low eh?

    I used to smash a dwarfy girl in. I called it a day when she started daubing herself in that fake tan shit, it was like rooting a fucking Oompa Loompa. Good as a one off but not as a regular rut. They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder… she was an ugly orange fuck.

  3. ^ Oh and yes….. I did smash her Chocolate Factory in.

  4. You ‘smashed it in’?

    Couldn’t you have just, like, paid for a day pass, or whatever? Other people need to use that chocolate factory you selfish bastard.

  5. Look matey, when I visit a chocolate factory I’m not there for the amusingly deadly tour of unusual murders, the weird fucking candy or the light hearted musical numbers… I’m there to make my cock go brown and hear a lady bum-hurt squeal ok?

    That said I apologise to anybody who had planned to visit that chocolate factory and was unable to do so due to my smashing it in.

  6. That’s a nice apology, Mofo. I’m proud of you, and I think the whole class are too, aren’t we, class (turns to class)

    Class all chorus ‘yes, we’re proud of mofo for apologising for smashing in that choclate factory’.

    … and at that very moment, I felt myself Quantum Leaping into a new body…

  7. I use these comment sections for nothing more than self promotion and to drive traffic up, I will freely admit
    So I don’t expect any of you to read, much less subscribe or comment on my work, but your curiosity leading you to view my site is vanity enough for me. Thanks for participating in my ego stroke.

  8. I’m sorry if I’m being thick, but is this just a post of some people making fun of a midget?

  9. lametothemin Yes. Yes it is. With a little story about how I arse fucked one thrown in for good measure… Anything else I can do to help?

    AlanDente If you really could Quantum Leap and you landed in a womans body, would you frig yourself off before doing anything to improve the life of the silly bint’s body that you landed in?… If it were me by the time she returned to her body she’d have a trough like a wheelie bin.

  10. Thanks, mofo. I just wanted to make sure this was as dumb as I thought it was. It is.

  11. CommentsAtLarge

    …hoping each time that his next leap will be the leap home…

  12. Oh my fucking god, imagine leaping into Imamofo. Ok I’ll be having another nightmare tonight then.

  13. I’m just leaving a comment to let slcrook know I’m looking at stuff on his link.
    You. Are. Welcome.


    If I ‘leaped into a woman’s body, I’d find you and use that body to lure you into a pre-prepared cage in a cave in Western Alaska. I’d then conduct all kinds of inhumane experiments on your mind and body under the vague auspices of ‘Scientific Research’ in the hope that one day I’d be famous when I was held up by fucktards on the American right wing (who think that Science is bad because it says different things to Gawd aka Jebus) as an example of the evil excesses that are the logical conclusion of the pursuit of science. After that, I’d masturbate furiously on a webcam with your dead body strung up behind me for a niche website and make a fortune.

    That’s the short answer.

    slcrook: your blog sounds like a 17 year old Macauley Culkin who’s been set loose on Europe with an AppleMac and a deep-seated need for some kind of affirmation.

  15. Hi AlanDente, you sound funny. Are you german?

  16. Alandente You can’t just use any old spunkslugs’ body mind, it’d have to be something I’d go for. A young Margaret Thatcher say or perhaps Winne Mandella?

    Also the plan may not work as I’m not a believer of Science, I know God exists because he talks to me. Everyday. He tells me to do things to people.

    curly I’d fucking love to leap into you. I can imagine your charming, lilting Irish brogue squealing as I landed in you cock first.

  17. Mofo, the best I can offer you is an old Angela Merkel.

    You don’t got to be a believer, you just gotta follow the instructions.

    Stoma: Ich bin sehr krank… eine krank Englander

  18. Hmmm not quite what i’m looking for to be honest (she looks to much like Elton John for my liking) do you do anything in a Mo Mowlam?

    Never been much good at following orders, unless their quite basic that is, you know, things like ‘put it in there’, ‘grab her pubes,’ ‘use the axe it’ll make less noise’ that sort of stuff.

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