Monday, September 6, 2010

Not So GrandMa

previous post: Stupid is…



  1. Gross……that is all.

  2. Props to grandma. Sad as it may be to the youth, people do have sex after the age of 40

  3. fake, granny talks like a teenager

  4. Ughhhhhhh. If she’s over 50, that’s just wrong on so many levels. But eh, I guess she’s honest.

  5. @Pedanticoldgit

    Well they shouldn’t. All sex should either be awkward and adolescent, or full of massively disproportionate boobs and penis’ like good ol’ porn.

  6. in this day and age grandpa is probably only 35. Completely acceptable.

  7. Everybody better get used to seeing stuff like this because in future, all these Lamebook worthy people that we laugh at will become “adults” and will still be talking about slaying dragons with Jesus in heaven and frolicking in the meadows. We are all doomed.

  8. I forgot to add “Gma wins”

  9. Grandma’s grasp of grammar may be a teenager’s, but it doesn’t take a gerontologist to tell you it’s possible to FB your grandchild in your 20s. Props should go to the kid, for surviving a world that thinks 15’s too old to settle down.

  10. @#4 Damn. I’m 45 and I just live in hope. I remember sex, vaguely. Apparently it was fun.

  11. Dammit, #5! DAMN KIDS, GET OFFA MY LAWN!

  12. i can just see her tombstone now:

    karen e
    a.k.a. gma

    19__ – 20__

    “nasty horney bitch”

    may god grant her eternal rest, apart from when she’s sleeping with the angels (jamaican).

  13. Yeah that’s disgusting. This woman can’t be any younger than 50. This is assuming she had her first child at 18, and they had THEIR first child at 18, making her a grandma at 36. This grandchild is obviously old enough to use facebook, so should I assume 14? I dunno. Either way, this is gross.

  14. Ooh look somebody mentioned a Jamaican! *feels cool*

    lol @alord… that could be translated to:

    let jah gi her forevah sleep, but for when she ah be rampin wid de angel dem.

  15. @Pedanticoldgit it’s not even that her age is possibly over 50 and she has sex, it’s more that she’s that old and can’t keep the information to her self. It’s disgusting for an adult over 40 to be that lewd. I wouldn’t be able to respect an elder who spoke that way. Good for her on the sex though I guess. It just make reminds me of the time I heard people in their 60’s talking about just discovering what BJ’s were.

  16. junebug, are you jamaican?

    i’m not allowed to say ‘eyrie’ because i’m white and english, so i’ll just say *niccccccce*.

    (if anyone sees the above as inverse racism, stupidly patronising, a pathetic attempt at pissy watered-down fuddy-duddy 21st century neo-pseudo-multiculturalism, then i can say with all smugness that you’re wrong! i just really want to sleep with a black woman!)

    june, my pillow talk’s even better than my lamebook postings; you get to smell my breath too. is it a date? πŸ™‚

  17. I agree with madonnakp. She’s allowed to have sex all she wants, but she should just keep it to herself.
    We would be just as weirded out if the roles were reversed. I don’t want to hear that much information, it doesn’t matter if you are 15 or 50, anywhere in between, or anywhere above or below.

    On another note, good for her, still getting that some young men!

  18. alord, say eyrie all you like, i promise not to tell my jamaican friends πŸ™‚ can’t claim it meself, cuz i live a tad bit further down the island chain, nor can i satisfy you urge fer some black gal loving… but if you want some half-Chinese/half-Indian pillowtalk then bring it onn πŸ˜›

  19. So fake!

  20. God forbid that someone who doesn’t conform to the modern norms of attraciveness actually dares to have sex and then talk about it! Good god! Don’t they realise that enjoying sex is the absolute preserve of anyone under 25? Anyone older than that shouldn’t have sex because there’s no room with all the beautiful young people doing it.

  21. june, a lot of colours on your palette there. i bet you look like van gogh’s starry night. i’m more like rothko’s ‘beige’ (not very well known for good reason).

    if you were ‘real’, or this were ‘real’, or you lived down the road (again, unlikely in the area i live in :-() i’d hit you all ends up.

    unfortunately, it’s just the internet, so i’ll have a mug of horlick’s (with a concessionary dash of rum), warm up my hot-water bottle, and fall asleep to dream of being brutalised by you and your friends from all over the islands. ‘gma’ can be master of ceremonies – that bitch sounds like she can or-che-strate!

  22. hahahah you had me at “I’d hit you all ends up”. you can pick up gma, I’ll gather my island gals, pop over to brazil for some amazonians (maybe I’ll find wonder woman :O) and hop on the next flight to England. you’ll know me by my very navy blue, very starry face. πŸ˜‰

  23. if you ever get to england, ask for imhotep. πŸ˜‰

  24. it shall be the only name upon my lips.

  25. I’m wishing I could click the like button on Gma’s post.

  26. I’m wishing I hadn’t puked in my lap..

  27. @ Alord “horlick’s (with a concessionary dash of rum)” I’m mentally kicking myself for never thinking about that combination (not so much dash as 3 fingers of rum).

  28. Please take pity on me and help me out guys, I crawled out of my cave yesterday and the world is new to me. That big bright ball in the sky hurts my eyes and i wasn’t around when they were creating racial norms: Alord and Junebug, why can’t Alord say “eyrie?” because he’s white? is that like the n-word?

  29. Dude you need to brush up on your racial slurs.

  30. It’s Irie BTW.

  31. When I read grandma’s reply, all i could hear is Betty White’s voice reading it to me in my head. Did that happen to anyone else? lol

  32. Irie is a racial slur? well I’ll be damned. You learn something new every day.

  33. If granny’s a nasty horney bitch, it’s quite possible for her to have had her first child when she was 13 or 14. That way she would only be in her 30s.

  34. … and that explains why I couldn’t find it on google.

  35. Win for grandma. If younger people are allowed to talk about their sex life, why not the elders? That’s discrimination.

    (BTW, nyone talking about their sex life on facebook falls under TMI, but I digress)

  36. @Pedanticoldgit

    That’s the issue…and “then talk about it”, in a very public place, with too many details.

    It’s annoying when both young and old people do it. Just keep it for yourself. Or don’t, otherwise this website would lose 90% of its content.

  37. “Live Nudes”. Same thing happened in Big Daddy with Adam Sandler….

  38. @ saffer

    i didn’t want to offend the eagles!

    @ dukey

    thanks for helping a brother out.

  39. I’m just annoyed that she’s spelling it ‘cuming’. Come on woman, you’re a grandmother now. It’s two m’s.

  40. I’m not even going to worry about the content of grandmas status update….I just want to know, has she never heard of a thing called “PUNCTUATION”???? God, take a breath.

  41. I don’t care for explicit detail, only because saggy balls and such make me cringe, but I’m glad she can still enjoy herself. (Most likely with the help of some super lube, but still do it just the same!)

  42. @els9874

    I don’t think you can blame someone old for typing very bad. Not only because it’s keyboard typing, which is something still “new” (takes longer for old people to learn), but also because many old people didn’t have access to proper education to what we have now. Depends on the country, of course. My grandfather sometimes mails me and he makes a (few) spelling mistake(s) on every single word, but I can’t blame him, he had to start working when he was 12.

  43. is lamebook (the site) having problems? there haven’t been any new posts today and it still says this post only has 30 comments.

  44. I am suddenly very attracted to alordslums.

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