I was trying to piggyback off other people’s internet on the weekend, but it’s bloody hard these days. People aen’t as internet-illiterate as they used to be. They’re all catching on and setting passwords that I have to waste time guessing, the bastards. Do they really think anybody’s gonna be trying to steal it?
I seriously LOL’d at the wi-fi. I am always amused at what people name their networks. I’m currently in range of: WillConnect4Burr, don’tfcukinusethis, O’Doyle Rules, and AJhasABS. Hahaha.
Oh, Saffer, yeeeesssss! Those bastards can deteriorate badly. Not exactly on the date specified, but you’d never trust one that has been in some guy’s wallet for eons. Believe me, there are guys out there carrying rubbers long past their expiration. Who’d want to sleep with someone who hasn’t been laid since the 90’s, anyway? It’s a sure sign of a dud.
Gentlemen, when you’re on the front lines facing a hungry, desperate, stinkin’, dripping wet enemy, an old weathered helmet is better than no helmet at all. Just trust me on this one.
And just because a guy has old helmets laying around doesn’t mean he hasn’t been fighting bad guys. It could just mean he’d been using other means of neutralizing the enemy for a while, like covertly poisoning their water supply.
It’s no use trying to garotte a hooker with an expired condom. Like word said, the latex deteriorates. Can you imagine if the the condom tore while you were strangling the hooker? Awkward!
That’s true, but the post said they were only nearing their expiry date, they may still be good to go for a week or two yet!
In the tense situation you have described above i would resort to humour to fill any awkward silences, we could both have a good old laugh over how cheap and shit this particular brand of jonnys was. and then i’d choke her with my bare hands.
Oh man, that wifi one is great.
I too am pretty fly for a wi-fi. Also, I’m betting Matt’s condoms expired and got pitched, never having been used.
Condoms have a pretty long shelf life.. Just sayin’.
Wi-fi LOL
I was trying to piggyback off other people’s internet on the weekend, but it’s bloody hard these days. People aen’t as internet-illiterate as they used to be. They’re all catching on and setting passwords that I have to waste time guessing, the bastards. Do they really think anybody’s gonna be trying to steal it?
That network name is great though.
ok so PB & J is an alcoholic beverage i’m assuming??
@ krissibee
Pretty sure she is talking about peanut butter and jelly. However, she does say “drinking with dairy”?
Its absolutely peanut butter and jelly. You drink milk w it.
i liked the first and last…the other two,,who cares.
I seriously LOL’d at the wi-fi. I am always amused at what people name their networks. I’m currently in range of: WillConnect4Burr, don’tfcukinusethis, O’Doyle Rules, and AJhasABS. Hahaha.
My wi-fi is for my neighbours – it’s called ‘shutyourfuckingdogsup’
I love wifi names. Ours is currently trojanwhores666 courtesy of the fiance. He likes him some Rome. And Satan.
Ours is currently SheHatesMe because apparently, I hate him. I like this one more than when he was calling me a whore for being mean.
they have expiration dates?!!!
Oh, Saffer, yeeeesssss! Those bastards can deteriorate badly. Not exactly on the date specified, but you’d never trust one that has been in some guy’s wallet for eons. Believe me, there are guys out there carrying rubbers long past their expiration. Who’d want to sleep with someone who hasn’t been laid since the 90’s, anyway? It’s a sure sign of a dud.
Gentlemen, when you’re on the front lines facing a hungry, desperate, stinkin’, dripping wet enemy, an old weathered helmet is better than no helmet at all. Just trust me on this one.
And just because a guy has old helmets laying around doesn’t mean he hasn’t been fighting bad guys. It could just mean he’d been using other means of neutralizing the enemy for a while, like covertly poisoning their water supply.
Hahaha. Good one.
i don’t get the pb&j flavor combination. bleh!
Love the first one – and the fact that it’s British! My wifi is Your Mum – jeuvenile but it still makes me smile.
I’m pretty sure that at least one of these was stolen from another site. Somewhere. Sometime. Probably 😉
@ Paranaid android
Don’t say that, it will encourage people to create an account just to say they don’t care that it was copied. Blah.
Also. Very good Shane, Very good.
The age old question ‘what should i do with this out of date sheath?’
easy….either man up and have a posh wank or use them to garotte an innocent hooker. (strangulation is probably not as easy as wanking)
I love you dakota
Also, Wifi was awesome!
@Imamofo
It’s no use trying to garotte a hooker with an expired condom. Like word said, the latex deteriorates. Can you imagine if the the condom tore while you were strangling the hooker? Awkward!
@EmKitteh
That’s true, but the post said they were only nearing their expiry date, they may still be good to go for a week or two yet!
In the tense situation you have described above i would resort to humour to fill any awkward silences, we could both have a good old laugh over how cheap and shit this particular brand of jonnys was. and then i’d choke her with my bare hands.
I love the wifi one!
@bunnyball- you must live two houses down from me.
The wi fi one is awesome! I got a chuckle about the bras too LOL. Especially since its soooo true!
my brother changed our wifi name to that a few months ago. it still makes me laugh