Tuesday, April 17, 2012

A Reason to Quit

previous post: House Rules Apply

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45 Comments

  1. Hasn’t improved your grasp of the English language, you fucktard.

  2. Been there, done that.

  3. Give the fucktard a break. He needs longer than 14 months to learn his English…

  4. This is fake.

  5. God told this joke as a boy.

  6. why would you even flick your lights? who does that bent or straight?
    don’t blame cannabis for your genetics failings, anthony.

  7. Some people think you can change a red light at an intersection by flashing your brights (not your tits, no) and it will change to green. The thought being this is how Emergency vehicles change the lights as they pass. I have no opinion on it but love the weed.

  8. in some countries, you can change the lights by flicking your lights at them. e.g. in sweden i remember this could be done. the lights have sensors in them that detect if there’s any traffic coming the other way when they “see” your high-beam, and if the result is no, it’ll give you a green. i remember it was quite hand, wish we had them here

  9. Of course the traffic lights are better in Sweden. Everything is better in Sweden.

  10. Q: Can you change a red light by flashing your high beams as you approach the intersection?

    A: No, a State Patrol spokesman said.

    And if drivers do that, they could get a $124 ticket for violating a state law regarding high beams.

    Drivers using high beams are trying to use their lights in the same way fire trucks use traffic signal preemption devices to change a light from red to green.

    The devices used by firefighters and other emergency personnel signal detectors on the traffic lights in a way headlights can’t.

  11. fuck that was pedantic and boring. someone slap me in the teeth.
    I’m off to my Rock History class.

  12. Don’t forget Women’s Studies afterward.

  13. ^is that a real thing?

  14. Apparently.

  15. Feminazi 101; Indemnifying yourself as a victim, an introduction to martyrdom.

  16. *Waits for someone to get offended.*

  17. don’t. you’ll just scare them off…fuck it.
    have you never been fishing before?

  18. Oh Ms. You are a master baiter.

  19. Skynet has become self aware. In one hour it will initiate a massive nuclear attack on its enemy.

  20. The Skynet Funding Bill is passed. The system goes on-line August 4th, 1997. Human decisions are removed from strategic defense. Skynet begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2: 14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th. In a panic, they try to pull the plug.

  21. Umm what?

  22. @curly – He’s here to protect us and we should go with him if we want to live.
    I’m going to wear my best jeans and tinfoil hat WITH FLOUNCES ON IT

  23. jeans? with an ass as big as yours?

    don’t.

  24. Maybe they’re those nifty new pajama jeans with teh elastic waist band.

  25. do they have jean muumuus? i think she’d like a garment with no restrictive waistline.

  26. oh silly little Ms. I know we’ve talked about this before but you really should get over your little crush on me.
    As well, I have been trolled and baited by the likes of people who would make even your skin crawl. There is very little you could even think of on your worst day that would get your the reaction you are so craving.
    I apologize for disappointing you as you clearly have checked back here numerous times hoping I was going to cry because someone who isn’t able to find their shift key called me fat. boohoo …

  27. MsAnneThrope… Since you brought up pedantry:

    You relay a conversation with a state trooper, I see a couple of issues with this. Firstly, if it is a state trooper talking about state laws, what if people are in a different state? Would a state trooper from Cali know the laws of Maine? Doubtful. Although maybe you do hail from the same state as this person.

    Also, other countries might have different systems for traffic lights, you know there are other countries than the US right? And would it be the first time someone has made a misconception about life in their own country based on the system of another? No.

    Lastly, this is an old joke, older than me, probably older than you.

    How’s that for fucking pedantry?

  28. fruitavelli, i think you missed the point dude.
    but good job on the fucking pedantry. do you feel like a tool? cos you sort of look like one right now.
    who. even. gives. a. fuck. about. the. facts.

  29. the holding tanks are getting full. we’re gonna have to turn this boat back to shore.

  30. there’s always…overboard. i’m sure capn could give us some pointers on walking the plank techniques

  31. what is this ‘us’ bullshit?

  32. wait…i thought we were…together?
    you mean i’m wrong??
    *runs off crying*

  33. this is why i’ll never be ‘crawling in men’.
    suck it, syndilou.

  34. Because you’re a bitch? Yeah, knew that already. Good observation of yourself I suppose.

  35. genius fucking observation., there.

    did you use a lifeline for that one, idiot?

  36. I hope you burned that fucking boat to the water, MsAnne.

  37. that wasn’t me.
    i just fired a couple of warning shots across the bows and then they scuttled themselves.

  38. “you sunk my battleship”
    you bitch.

  39. Bacchante, do you need a persistent gimp?
    I have this slug creature, but i think it is more like a fucking leech.
    i guess you wouldn’t want it, huh?

  40. Actually, MsAnne, I think I have a space opening up sometime this week!
    I can’t seem to keep the poor things alive… maybe they need less sunshine?

  41. *slurping noises ensue as bacchante and msanne finally decide how to use slg for their twisted sex games and get to work on eating each other’s assholes out*

  42. You got it in one, SLG. I am the neediest rimadonna here.

  43. HAH! sweet!!
    thanks for the literal lol

  44. good one, slug – you missed the condescension. again.

  45. did i msanne? really? oh you’re so perceptive you can see into my mind and shit.
    you know, i’m really grateful i have you here to point out what i’ve missed and where i’m going wrong and stuff. i feel that under this tutelage i’ll become just like you in no time at all.
    so grateful, msanne.

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