Thursday, October 7, 2010

Oh Please!

previous post: Dirty Laundry



  1. Go Lance… A for effort.

  2. Stalkers gonna stalk…

    Glad this poor girl was smart enough to cut this whack-job off at the start. Creep factor is at 11.

  3. What a total creep!

  4. reproachfulrabbit

    Yay for Alena’s dad, but why didn’t she just delete and block the weirdo?

  5. I think Lance needs to be lanced and just turn completely gay. He would be the woman in that relationship.

  6. Lance should have put:

    “I’m on yo base with yo daughter”


    “Hey Alena’s dad… I’m already IN the house! BWHAHAAHA”

    That would have made things better for everyone.

  7. They’re like 16 or something, it’s prob his first heartbreak. Jeez, give the boy a break.(no pun intended)

  8. @reproachfulrabbit, I think she secretly still likes him and his creepiness… what girl wouldn’t be charmed by a man having such persistence for her?
    Did I say man? Oops..

  9. hobo, are you there?

    when you read this, please imagine that lance is actually justin bieber.


  10. “BABY I GET PANIC ATTACKS…” haha 🙂

    #4 It sounds like she has the “I’m going to be nice and polite to everybody” syndrome, so she’ll keep replying and she won’t delete him because that would just be, well… mean. I used to be like that :p

  11. Holy excessive use of “baby”.

    Poor guy. He’s going to look back at this in a few months and realize what a pathetic cunt he was. Oh well, first breakups are usually pretty tough. Once you get used to them, they’re kinda fun.

  12. Desperate Arsewipes. A new series featuring heartbroken teens on TV. Oh wait…

  13. Hey leave the creepy perverted stalker guy alone…. I remember this one time when a woman got arrested and her innocence got proved by her secret creepy perverted stalker guy..

    So yeah, creepy perverted stalker guy’s can save you from 20 years of anal rape in jail, but then again he could rape you… so it could go either way….

  14. Lol, what in Ben’s name is this trite garbage?!

  15. Props to Alena for being able to put up with him for three weeks. I would have shot him after three minutes.

  16. Lance is a pussy…just like all “men” named Lance.

  17. Lance reminds me of my first husband *Shudder*

  18. comments #s 1 and 15 FTW.

    @ # 4: then it would not have been here to entertain us! how boring the world would be if everyone had common sense!

  19. Lance reminds me of my first 15 husbands. Killed ’em all. Can’t live with them, whiney little snot nose fucktards.

  20. I can’t stand this whiny shit! By the way, Lance is probably 13.

  21. Lance puts the lotion on the skin.

  22. @nuff
    haha, nice. Lance also wonders if she’s a size 14.

  23. 12-year-old drama is why I log in to LB every day. Thanks LameBook!

  24. Lance is the type of guy that probably jerks it to victoria secret magazines . You know , he wants it so bad…….. you were so close lance , you should have locked her in the closet when you had the chance

  25. I think I’ve known too many Lances in my time. *shudder*

  26. this kid is beyond a creeper. although “baby i get panic attacks” is probably the best line ever used.

  27. Did anyone else think of this????

  28. What a complete idiot! Can’t Alena see what she’s giving up?

  29. Is Lance the pimp from the South Park episode “Butters Bottom Bitch”? “BABY PLEEEEASE! I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU!”

  30. #26
    Good point… “baby i get panic attacks” is a great line. If he had only stuck to one or two “baby please”‘s then it might have been a win for him

  31. Hey, at least she’s a kid and has a dad to protect her. At my age when guys act like that I have to keep a gun next to my pillow.

  32. Somebody make this into a song.

  33. hahaha i still can’t get over this …. baby pleeaaase. still making me giggle when i think about him

  34. @MEG – I think N-Dubz would be the perfect band for the job. I can just imagine it now. For those who don’t know who the frankly MARVELLOUS N-Dubz are, check here: Seriously, it’s all good. They’re going to save urban music fo realz after they’re done with detention.

    Bloke 1: Baby baby baby please, I is findin it hard to breathe
    Girl: Get lost loser you’re too panicky for me
    Bloke 2: Baby please please I’m comin over, gotta wait til school is over
    Girl: Nah don’t bother my dad’s come home, he said he’ll kick your head in if you call me on the phone – it’s overrrrrrr
    Blokes: Nah, don’t say it’s over, Baby baby please, I got panic attacks so bad I got to wheeze
    Girl’s Dad: Fuck off you midget wanker, she said it’s overrrrrr
    Blokes: Nah please don’t say it’s overrrrr
    Girl: I got my daddy he’s the man for me, doesn’t whinge as much and he’s got more cash money

    I’m sorry. That sucked. It’s 9am and the coffee’s not hit my braincells yet, but I did amuse myself.

  35. Justin Bieber already made it into a song. It’s called Baby P:

  36. baby please??

  37. This was sweet, in a creepy kind of way…

  38. Alena is pregnant with my child. That’s why she left him.


  40. @38. Perfect. Hopefully she will post baby pictures on fb, I enjoy those even more than peeps bellyaching on there.

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