I used to really get irritated that no one ever posted “happy birthday” on my wall. So, I began a new system: Every year, everyone who was on my friends list but didn’t wish me a happy birthday got added to my “naughty list”.
Each Christmas Eve, I would dress up in a Santa suit and go to the house of a random person on my naughty list. I would silently break in, sneak up on their sleeping forms, and beat them to death with a sack full of coal. I would then prop their lifeless bodies on the antlers of eight tiny reindeer on their front lawn to serve as a lesson for others.
I’ve been carrying on this tradition for the past 3 years, and just the other day I noticed I had my Facebook settings set to disallow friends from posting anything on my wall. Oops.
Andrea is a perfect example of why the United States will continue to fall in academic credibility. It’s difficult to take a spoiled brat seriously that doesn’t think a higher education really means anything.
1. At some institutions and with some majors, an undergraduate degree really is like taking an extended nap. Can’t really say this applies for my school or degree, but it certainly does for a lot of others.
2. Also, I wouldn’t discredit all people who don’t have to pay for their schooling. I don’t pay for my schooling, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t work hard for years and continue to work hard to receive scholarships and prove to my parents that I am a worthy investment.
@11
Yes, Harvard and Yale are continuing to lose reputability due to girls like Amanda. Don’t lump everyone in the same category or judge an entire nation’s educational institutions based on one specific group of people.
Brad is a cocksucking spoilt little shit who needs a good kick in the head. If i lived near him i would do it myself.
Andrea is a stupid slut! You’re at college to learn, not to bludge. That is what highschool was for. Some people!
@3: I pissed myself laughing and cried for a good 10 minutes. You sir = WIN!!!
@14: I find this hard to believe. If a person is at University doing a major, one would think that this person would have to put in some really hard yards.
@28 – My dad has actually argued with me about my birthday before. My birthday is March 24, but for years he had it in his head that it was April 4. Of course, he’s an engineer, which is probably explanation enough.
Hey Mike,
If you ever get tired of paying for Andrea’s education, which she seems so grateful for, you can always help me out! I’ve been paying my own way for 3 years now, and any help is appreciated.
Brad is that superfuck who screams “No mum you bitch I wanted the silver convertable not the fucking blue one!!!”
And if anyone finds themselves sporting bulging head veins from sheer anger at this megadouche, relax. Take solace in the fact that sweet justice has prevailed, as but two of his frat brother fuck buddies took the time to convey their ‘sincere’ birthday wishes via facebook.
That being said, Brad, if you still need help in ‘offing’ yourself, I’m sure anyone here would be happy to share some helpful tips 🙂
“hard yards” ?? ha. maybe you’re unfamiliar with the average college experience these days….the typical undergrad diploma these days is really just the new highschool diploma. Yes, there are some universities and programs that are quite rigorous, but let’s not fool ourselves, getting a 4 year degree these days is a cakewalk.
My mum thinks my birthday is on Halloween. My birthday is on the 27th of October. She still thinks that, and I’m still receiving Halloween-themed presents from her. God, woman, you gave birth to me, can’t you even remember the day you shat me out?
@Dee: Should have said popped you out. Now people are going to be thinking of Rooster Poo whenever they see your name.
Halloween is not so bad. My mums birthday is on Halloween. Every year i run up and scream trick or treat! Because this scares her, i claim that trick is her birthday present :).
People are taking FB too seriously these days. “If it’s not on facebook it’s not official” and other such drivel. OMFG no one wished me Happy birthday on facebook! Damn me, people need to get outdoors and see the sunshine again
^^ That’s why there is a birthday/apology someecard that says “I’m sorry I only wished you Happy Birthday in person and not on your Facebook wall”. duh.
Also, if you don’t know what a someecard is, you really need to go to someecards.com…like, yesterday. I’m reasonably sure that everyone on this site would love them.
No pity for Bradolph Pittler?
brads a little bitch.. i dont feel sorry for him
I used to really get irritated that no one ever posted “happy birthday” on my wall. So, I began a new system: Every year, everyone who was on my friends list but didn’t wish me a happy birthday got added to my “naughty list”.
Each Christmas Eve, I would dress up in a Santa suit and go to the house of a random person on my naughty list. I would silently break in, sneak up on their sleeping forms, and beat them to death with a sack full of coal. I would then prop their lifeless bodies on the antlers of eight tiny reindeer on their front lawn to serve as a lesson for others.
I’ve been carrying on this tradition for the past 3 years, and just the other day I noticed I had my Facebook settings set to disallow friends from posting anything on my wall. Oops.
BWAHAHHHAHAHA , finally , that dude killed himself , the birthday plan worked
Geez, Andrea: don’t friend your mom and she won’t get mad at the stupid things you write on your wall. Problem solved.
Sensible Madness For the Psycho WIN!!
I laughed out loud
@5
I don’t think that ‘Mike’ is Andrea’s mom…
@7
Whoops…dad* :X
Aw poor Brad, nobody loves him.
Andrea is gonna have to put a little more effort in to get that next big cheque from daddy.
Obviously, Andrea is doing the wrong thing with her life.
Andrea is a perfect example of why the United States will continue to fall in academic credibility. It’s difficult to take a spoiled brat seriously that doesn’t think a higher education really means anything.
Wow. She’s just lucky that she has daddy to pay for her school. Unlike some of us, we need to pay for our schooling.
I bet Brad is a dead ringer for the actor who played Zack on Saved By The Bell except with a worse preppy hairstyle.
1. At some institutions and with some majors, an undergraduate degree really is like taking an extended nap. Can’t really say this applies for my school or degree, but it certainly does for a lot of others.
2. Also, I wouldn’t discredit all people who don’t have to pay for their schooling. I don’t pay for my schooling, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t work hard for years and continue to work hard to receive scholarships and prove to my parents that I am a worthy investment.
@11
Yes, Harvard and Yale are continuing to lose reputability due to girls like Amanda. Don’t lump everyone in the same category or judge an entire nation’s educational institutions based on one specific group of people.
Brad is a cocksucking spoilt little shit who needs a good kick in the head. If i lived near him i would do it myself.
Andrea is a stupid slut! You’re at college to learn, not to bludge. That is what highschool was for. Some people!
@3: I pissed myself laughing and cried for a good 10 minutes. You sir = WIN!!!
@14: I find this hard to believe. If a person is at University doing a major, one would think that this person would have to put in some really hard yards.
the nap one was recently posted on texts from last night
WTF people? It’s been my birthday for 17 hrs and you’re still not kissing my ass yet!!
@14. Oochie that little payload from your dad continues to earn big dividends. Don’t you worry.
yeah, nap one totally stolen from TLFN.
lol i meant TFLN*
fail for me
nutter butter, who’s Amanda?
Amanda Hugginkiss?
Tooch
Lamebook has raised the lameness bar.
God damn people like Andrea. *raises fist*
Zoned
Fret not. People like Andrea will be chewed up by academia and spit out by the porn industry.
Goodbye books, hello pole!
I love that Brad’s own mother possibly didn’t even remember his birthday until he posted about it on FB.
@28 – My dad has actually argued with me about my birthday before. My birthday is March 24, but for years he had it in his head that it was April 4. Of course, he’s an engineer, which is probably explanation enough.
Hey Mike,
If you ever get tired of paying for Andrea’s education, which she seems so grateful for, you can always help me out! I’ve been paying my own way for 3 years now, and any help is appreciated.
to post number 3. that’s the greatest thing i’ve read all day.
Brad is that superfuck who screams “No mum you bitch I wanted the silver convertable not the fucking blue one!!!”
And if anyone finds themselves sporting bulging head veins from sheer anger at this megadouche, relax. Take solace in the fact that sweet justice has prevailed, as but two of his frat brother fuck buddies took the time to convey their ‘sincere’ birthday wishes via facebook.
That being said, Brad, if you still need help in ‘offing’ yourself, I’m sure anyone here would be happy to share some helpful tips 🙂
“hard yards” ?? ha. maybe you’re unfamiliar with the average college experience these days….the typical undergrad diploma these days is really just the new highschool diploma. Yes, there are some universities and programs that are quite rigorous, but let’s not fool ourselves, getting a 4 year degree these days is a cakewalk.
@33 It’s pretty damn sad that if it is really is such a cakewalk that so many people a) don’t finish or b) finish anything below Cum Laude.
I graduated in ’04 and it certainly wasn’t a 4 year nap.
For me it was a four year drink fest, but I paid my own *hic* way and I turned out alright *hic*.
@ Anitalaff – comment 27: Brilliant. Coming soon to a porn film near you, Andrea R!
So how exactly did you pay your way through your 4 undergrad years…?
@ cunninglinguist
My mum thinks my birthday is on Halloween. My birthday is on the 27th of October. She still thinks that, and I’m still receiving Halloween-themed presents from her. God, woman, you gave birth to me, can’t you even remember the day you shat me out?
@Dee: Should have said popped you out. Now people are going to be thinking of Rooster Poo whenever they see your name.
Halloween is not so bad. My mums birthday is on Halloween. Every year i run up and scream trick or treat! Because this scares her, i claim that trick is her birthday present :).
@ 3
i haven’t laughed that hard in months
sensible madness for the win on that one
seriously fucking oops?
oops?!
Sensible, you, sir, are a champion.
People are taking FB too seriously these days. “If it’s not on facebook it’s not official” and other such drivel. OMFG no one wished me Happy birthday on facebook! Damn me, people need to get outdoors and see the sunshine again
^^ That’s why there is a birthday/apology someecard that says “I’m sorry I only wished you Happy Birthday in person and not on your Facebook wall”. duh.
Also, if you don’t know what a someecard is, you really need to go to someecards.com…like, yesterday. I’m reasonably sure that everyone on this site would love them.