Monday, August 13, 2012

The Friendzone

previous post: John’s Car



  1. Princess is a fake name.

  2. Her boyfriend’s a raging alcoholic, and don’t forget the complaints she must make.

  3. I intentionaly friendzone fat chicks to get to their skinny friends. The only problem though is when you hook up with their pals they get mad because they seen you first.. I hate jealous women, they’re so annoying. One girl got so pissed at the other one one day cuz me and her friend started kissing and feeling each other up at the gas station on the way to drop them off after I met them up at the park that day. They were an easy catch, I just played the “hey, my girlfriend just broke up with me, can I ask you a couple of questions? *activate sad puppy face* card. I’m usually a pretty nice guy, but when it comes to just hooking up, it’s all fair game, amiright?. Little white lies never hurt anyone anyways…lol…

  4. I applaud you cap’n.

  5. Jesus christ capnjaques, glad you got that one off your chest? When typing that did you ever think to stop short, but instead said fuck it I’ll just carry on typing complete shit.

  6. any time someone writes/talks that much about hooking up with someone it is a complete lie

  7. How about Fuck you. Stupid fucking bitch.

  8. And women like “Princess” wonder why they wind up with douchebags? Facepalm….

  9. Your feelings have been noted, in the shit that doesn’t matter file. Since when is a couple of sentences writing too much? Maybe I should go around slapping people with my hickory stick more often, guess I’ve been getting a little too soft on some of you cuntburgers lately! 🙂 If I get really bored later I’m going to have to activate Capn’s Storytime. Give ya’s plenty of shit to read! But if I’m gonna go through all that trouble, perhaps I should start drinking. Lord knows it’s been a few days since I’ve had me a drink, or 8…Maybe it’s time…

  10. friendzone?? more like

  11. CapnJaques mom asked me to call her Princess as a plowed her from behind.

  12. ^Man, you must be pretty hard up to go after that beast. If I didn’t feel so sorry for you I might have invited you to stay for coffee..

  13. Cap’n I love that your ma told the 9er to call her ‘poo princess’ as he plowed her from behind and that he did as he was told

    good boy 9, you keep doing just what Cap’ns mum tells ya mate.. just don’t forget to strap that plank to your ass otherwise we may loose you to the chocolate vortex

  14. In the photo is the Rear Admiral using his hat to cover a raging fucking hard on?.. I’m just asking, because if I was a Rear Admiral and I had a bonk on whilst stood next to Obama, I’d use my hat to cover it…

    Well either my hat or Michelle’s mouth.

  15. He’s probably gay, and that’s why he’s in the friendzone.

  16. Anyone that complains about being in the friendzone is a pussy.

    And I agree, that was a pretty obvious lie by CapnJacques. If he wasn’t a pathetic virgin, he wouldn’t feel the need to write so much about his sexual adventures.

  17. I claim winner of this thread….now give me muh god damn cookie! EC, come’ere and let me tug on those tiny udders’a’urs, I need some cow tit to go with these bad boys!

  18. ^


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