Monday, December 19, 2011

What I Do When Someone Gets Engaged…

previous post: Winner!



  1. Ta fuck?

  2. So, either 1) Samantha is the type to constantly drive her friends crazy with every little tidbit about her wedding plans; or 2) her friend is a bitter douchebag who can’t stand the fact that Samantha’s engaged.

  3. maybe he’s psychic and could sense he’d only see wedding plans on his Facebook for the next few months

  4. I have defriended 3 people so far because they dedicated a whole photo album to show off their blood diamond.

  5. Codename Dutchess

    In terms of “most insufferable pieces of shit on the internets” it goes 1) pregnant women 1A) engaged women. Facebook needs moderators to step in and tell them, “Look, stop. Just…stop. No one gives a flying fuck.”

  6. So……where’s the humor?

  7. I’m an engaged woman and I don’t post a thousand ooey-gooey pictures of my fiance and I, nor my engagement ring, the stones in which are onyx and garnet. I also don’t spam everyone with shitty status updates consisting of “I <3 MY FIANCEEEEEE," because I'm not a fucking asshole.

  8. @anders,

    thats hilarious to me, because while you are posting about how you are not one of those girls, you feel the need to tell us that your ring is onyx and garnet? lol you ARE one of those girls…

  9. Pregnant women and mothers deserve to die a slow death. Fucking annoying cunts! No one gives a fuck about little Bella or Bella to be.

  10. Yes, newly engaged women can be annoying as fuck, but I’m reading this as: a guy is unsubscribing to Samantha because she’s now off the market…maybe he can catch her on the rebound after the divorce?

  11. bradles…rude as hell. After all, I’m sure that wouldn’t apply to your own mother huh? Also, if you don’t care, you shouldn’t be friends with them in ANY way…douche canoe.

  12. I wish bradles’ mother had died a slow death while she was pregnant. and everything else fearochseregruin (#11) just said.

  13. @bradles Every time I hear someone say they’re naming their daughter “Bella”, I’m like “Why the hell would you name her after the dude that played Dracula?”

  14. This is more boring than watching a clone of me die of boredom. Which is actually pretty exciting.

  15. …I’m pretty sure the reason this person is unsubscribing is because he is a guy and he knows that the girl is now “off limits,” and he has no chance of banging her now. It’s like that scrubs episode where JT doesn’t “see” women who are wearing engagement rings. C’mon guys, keep up.

  16. at least that’s why I unsubscribe.

  17. Hey swampmonster, did you miss the comment about ‘blood diamonds’ (the only reason my ring was relevant)?
    Also, fuck you. 🙂

  18. Are there even any diamonds in that ring?

  19. @ fearoetc – my mother didn’t have Facebook in 1984, but if she did, and posted what her bullshit cravings were every few hours, that death wish also extends to her.

    @ Anne – I hope your whole family contracts a rare and contagious form of dementia. I also hope that during their final, painful years, they can’t remember who you are and wonder why the fat, ugly and forever alone woman keeps visiting them. Then death.

    Yeah. That’d be sweet.

  20. Sorry, that was directed at AnneThrope, not the Anne above me. Just my luck.

  21. ^it happened because I am right and you are shite.

  22. @ Swampmonster, hear hear!! @Anders, if you WEREN’T one of those girls, why the fuck did you come onto a random website to tell a bunch of strangers that? You’re right, you’re not “one of those girls” at least “those girls” are only sharing their news with friends an family who are likely to take an interest. You however, are much fucking worse. An attention seeker who presuambly has 50+ friends on Facebook, most of whom are old college friends/family, who take no interest whatsoever in your Facebook doings, so you need to claim the attention elsewhere…just like me.

    Bradles, you’re a cunt. Like, not the cuntish, trollish type, but the cuntish type that actually ruins peoples lives. Who really gives a fuck if someone wants to celebrate their pregnancy/engagement? Just move onto stalking the next person you fucking nazi.

  23. I hardly believe bradles was born in ’84. Reading his comments I still doubt he was born in ’94. You are such a sad little boy.

  24. While I have some friends who are fine when they’re engaged (they post a ring photo and maybe mention that they’ve selected a dress), I also have a lot of “friends” who did the “spam the living shit out of everyone for a year (or more, if they were going for a long engagement) with nonsense about flower arrangements and cake and guest lists”. If there had been an unsubscribe feature when one of these people was engaged, I would have used it.

    Oh, and it’s also not just girls who are annoying as shit about engagement/marriage.

  25. @ anders,

    Hey look! You managed to complete a sentence without mentioning your ring!

    Congratulations! Too bad you still come across as a douche.

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