Tuesday, October 27, 2009

When You’re Typin’ on the John, and Your Dignity is Gone


previous post: Michael’s Got Balls



  1. what.the.hell

  2. Jake has issues.

  3. Jake is awesome.

  4. Disturbing.

  5. jake is the shit. no pun intended.

  6. Jake over shares.

    No one needs to know that buddy. It’s bad enough that he did that, much worse that he felt the need to share it.

  7. wiping finally? what was stopping him before?

  8. This is the kind of thing I would claim as a fake – obviously posted by Jake for shock value, with the intention of being featured here.

  9. @Karm

    The liquidy secretions that were still coming out of his anus were stopping him before.

    Sorry… you asked.

  10. If I ever find out that a friend of mine is on the toilet, while I’m chatting to them, they are going to be blocked immediately.

  11. Dani @2: “tissues” maybe. At least by the time of the last update. Perhaps that’s what was the reason for not wiping until then.

  12. Soulja Boy Tell 'Em

    That is awesome.
    Brilliant title.

  13. TMI.

  14. This reminds of the Seinfeld episode where George takes a book into a bookstore’s bathroom and is then forced to purchase his reading material. He is subsequently unable to return it to he store or even donate it to charity as it has been flagged in multiple databases as a “bathroom book”.

    Now it seems we have a “bathroom craptop” that is deemed to be unfit for everyone else in society but Jake himself.

  15. *return it to THE store*

  16. And the Mylanta won’t do him any good, because it’s an antacid. What he really needed was some Pepto-bismol

  17. I though this was funny and not lame at all.

  18. Ring sting is the worst.
    I will pray for you Jake.

  19. Seriously, I do lots of things on the toilet. I will have entire phone conversations while dropping a deuce. That doesn’t mean I tell everyone about it. That’s just too much info, Jake.

  20. Goddammit, MY name is Jake. Thanks for ruining it.

  21. How do you wipe and type at the same time?

  22. Give me a post like this over girls that do nothing but post their favorite quotes because the don’t have a single original thought in their bubble heads any day of the week.

    I think more people should discuss their bowels on Facebook.

  23. @21… like this…

  24. lol @Jenn

  25. I should hope he was “wiping finally”. If he was wiping initially, there would be more serious questions to answer.

  26. Jesus Christ. Say it with me people: FACEBOOK IS NOT TWITTER.

  27. Jake you need a life.

  28. Well done Jake on ensuring you won’t get laid for the next year!!
    There’s some shit that’s meant to be kept private (bad pun fully intended)

  29. this may be fake, no? the status updates would have the most recent on top.

  30. GreySkyedEyes, Lamebook usually edits the posts so that they read in chronological order downwards to make them easier to follow.

    Oh, Jake. Way too much information.

  31. @ bela okmyx

    Immodium AD would be better. Anti-diarrheal medication 🙂

  32. ..this reminds me of me…

  33. The best part about this is the title

  34. im literally on the toliet right now with my laptop reading this

  35. ^ agreed. I have WAY too many friends who write this kind of… errr… shit in their status updates.

  36. Oh silly him. Must have confused the status update with his twitter account. Happens to some of us, the dumb sum of us.

  37. …………………………………….

  38. It’s sad that talking on mobiles is now more ‘acceptable’ these days! I remember the days everyone would turn them off when going to the bathroom for fear of them ringing. But now, I hear (usually younger girls teens – mid-twenties) talking on them on the toilet with other people flushing their toilets all around – surely the other side knows what’s going on?!! EEEEEWWWWWWWW! People get some respect & let toilet happenings be PRIVATE!

  39. Just wondering if we can see any reflections in that photo? It was obviously taken while he was on the loo.

  40. Hahaha @ hossain! as well the title really cracked me up!

  41. goddamn, facebook sucks more and more.. why the fuck would anyone care about someones bowel movement, no matter how bad are they to the person.. keep that SHIT only to youself!!

  42. Keep that shit only for Yusuf!

  43. or flush it down the toilet.

  44. I know this guy. He left his facebook open and his friends posted all of these statuss

  45. thats a long poop.

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