Friday, May 21, 2010

Background Checks

previous post: FANtastic Friday (part 2)



  1. You guys are being really unfair to those girls. It’s just as likely that they sat down much further away from the giant grape woman to take their picture but her gravitational pull forced them closer. We can only hope they were able to realize what was going on in time to accelerate at least fast enough to maintain a stable orbit around her so they didn’t end up crashing into her at high speed.

  2. BeautifullyDizzy

    I feel really bad for the girl in #3. Poor girl looks just plain miserable and ashamed. I hope karma bites those bitches in the a$$!

  3. Picture five leaves me with so many unanswered questions:

    What is up with partying at the mattress store?
    …Why are two guys getting it on?
    …On a mattress with other peoiple on it
    …And no one is in shock?

  4. BeautifullyDizzy

    I’m pretty sure #5 is at a club…

  5. texas, 2 guys?, that ain’t no guy he’s on top of, and that’s a club, you see those big lounge/bed things in many places.

    As for being in shock, eh, it would take a bit more than heavy petting to move the masses, I’d say.

  6. It took me a while to realize there was someone in the background in pic 2.

  7. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    πŸ™ poor #3

    Aqua boobs look totally fake. But then it could be the hater in me. I doubt that though! Quite happy with mine just the way they are!

    @texasbeautyf #5 is a guy and a gal. Not sure how you see two dudes?

  8. Who cares if aqua books are fake, she got her money’s worth. AquaBoobs FTW…. yum…

  9. Normally I am the first to jump in with some fatty jokes, but I feel bad for the purple girl. Her feelings of humiliation, boredom and low self esteem are very plain to see. Which makes me pretty angry someone would take a picture to make fun of her…if that IS what happened, which I’m not sure from the pose.

  10. I don’t see anything wrong in the second pic. In fact, I don’t even see the background. All I see are titties.

  11. I’m with melissaphlegm @ #42. The girl on Wilmer’s right arm is smokin’ hot, and FAR more attractive than aquaboobs.

    Also, I wouldn’t mind being a wedding crasher at the reception following the bachelorette party in pic #4. A couple of those girls are pretty cute too.

  12. There are two (black) strippers in the 4th pic, and only one of them is at work.

  13. rockinghorsefly

    I don’t think aquaboobs necessarily has fake ones – mine are easily as nice as that and real.

    Fat girl just makes me really sad.

    None of these are funny.

  14. Lamebooooooook πŸ™ Stop iiiiiit πŸ™

    Seriously. Stop just posting pictures of fat girls or whatever, as if that by itself is lame, or funny, or whatever.

    I get worried sometimes that this site isn’t the way I think it is, and the posts are more about laughing at fat people, and laughing WITH the people who make racist comments and jokes about women making sandwiches (long time readers may have noticed I FUCKING hate these jokes and am a boring repetitive twat in this area).

  15. I would wreck that chick in the teal dress. Those boobs are meant for me to motorboat them. Just being honest here.

  16. Fat Girl Photo is just one of those progression type pictures, like when they show the evolution of apes to neanderthals to modern man. This continues man’s journey by charting the devolution of modern Americans.

    Middle Girl is the start, Right Girl is the chubby interim phase, and Left Girl is the final fuck you to Charles Darwin.

    Please note that they aren’t doing a “point” or a “peace sign”. They are trying to represent their positions (1, 2, etc.), but they’re too goddamn stupid to get it right.

    You are all correct that the picture is sad, but you’re sad for the wrong reasons.

  17. rebarbativebecc

    Last pic, I think the person taking the photo definitely used the guys in front as an excuse to take a pic of those people lol, they’re not even in frame πŸ˜›

    Fat girl pic, what? Fat people aren’t allowed to sit near skinny people now? I wouldn’t care and neither should anyone else.

    I agree with BritishHobo and @29, the girl looks so sad already and it really looks like they included her in the photo on purpose to laugh at her πŸ™

  18. Why is Elixabeth annoying exactly?

    And I might be in the minority here, but I got the feeling lamebook added the picture with the fat girl BECAUSE it’s obvious that the two skinny girls were just making fun of her. Thus, the lameness is on THEM and not HER.

  19. first and last are shopped

  20. @Crispy_Bandana
    elixabeth started out by not saying anything other than leaving that signature. Nothing except pushing an apparent agenda. Now it’s talking. If it starts contributing, that’s great. But it very much seemed like spam when it first showed up. That’s why it’s perceived as annoying.

    Shopping is the foundation of business. Business is the foundation of capitalism. Why do you hate America?

  21. #2: Haha it’s a gold-digger! The guy, I mean!

    Hm, that was a lot funnier in my head.

  22. @rockinghorsefly:

    I don’t believe you at all. Uh uh. Come to Florida and let me judge for myself. After I conduct several days worth of testing, I will share my findings with the Lamebook community – if I can find the strength to post.

  23. Words to think on…

    The beauty of anonymous site like this, is that someone can say they look like aqua girl, but actually look like purple girl.
    The leaps of faith taken on here at times are amusing, and we all do it.

    Ahh well.

  24. rockinghorsefly

    @stretch: I am going to have to decline your very generous offer, you will just have to trust that I am being truthful. πŸ˜‰

  25. number 2: WHOA those are some big boobs
    number 4: holy crap are they having doggy style?!!!

  26. yeah you two bitches don’t make fun of the fat girl you don’t know what you’re going to look like in a few years….

  27. Cobaltcat,
    I don’t care how much fun they make of that fat girl, she is FAT. As in: DISGUSTINGLY SO. There is no way that would happen to a healthy chick in a few years. Try 20.

  28. Knucklepopper, actually there is.
    All it takes is a thyroid desease and you’re up 60 pounds in a year, while everyone, including yourself, is mystified as to why this happens. The world, and unfortunately still many doctors, then assumes you’re just stuffing your face with sweets while noone is watching, while you desperately starve yourself, do hours of sport and cry in your pillow. And get judged by the clueless, of course.

  29. “It’s just as likely that they sat down much further away from the giant grape woman to take their picture but her gravitational pull forced them closer.” – SM

    LOLOL ^

  30. Ugh, those dumb chicks in picture 3 are making duckface.

  31. That is no peace sign. Though it is sign language. They are saying look at us compared to her. She obviously did not want to be in the photo. You can tell by the way she is trying to just kinda lean away from them. I’m with Cobalcat on this one.

  32. Knucklepopper is a douche.

    Also i don’t think the two girls are making fun of the girl in the purple dress. As the fat friend I think i can fairly assess what happened here: The two girls decided purple girl would be less hard on herself and depressed if they talked her into going out with them. So they went to her house and dressed her up to try to make her feel pretty. All this did was show her the distict contrast between herself and the skinny girls regardless of how much makeup they put on her. Wouldn’t this make you depressed and want to shy away from having your photo taken?

    Might be over-identifying but that doesn’t change the fact that knucklepopper is a total douche.

    Btw, I think Knucklepopper is a douche.

    (And thanks whattf; nice that some people know)

  33. *distinct.

  34. Nice photobombing by John Goodman in the 2nd pic.

  35. When I judge people physically, I like use statistically unlikely reasons for their appearance. Occam’s razor can suck it.
    Fat person: Must be hypothyroidism.
    Thin person: You know it’s hyperthyroidism.
    Mentally challenged person: They’re probably Irish.
    Attractive person: Witches’ potion

    Oh well, I probably won’t be around much anymore as I’m certain that I will win the upcoming lottery drawing. How can I lose?

  36. Then you can just buy that whorehouse in Germany Soup. When you do, remember that I prefer redheads. I’m not to picky though, anything with a pulse will do.

  37. I’m with Soup on his judgements, those are the things that always come to my mind (I shall now remove my tongue that is embedded firmly in my cheek).

    But I’m winning that lottery, Soup, not you, but I’ll share with you. Promise.

  38. I think Whattf’s point in bringing up hypothyroidism is simply that you don’t know the whole story; so stop judging in general. Because you are honestly clueless.

  39. @HeSaidWhat
    The geriatric wing will always be open to you.

    After I win, I will be buying a ticket to come down your way. I can’t wait to meet Paul Hogan.

    Thank you for judging me on my judgments. Your objections to my assumptions have made me consider a different verdict. From now on I won’t offer facetious comments, I’ll just call anyone who disagrees with me uninformed.

  40. At least I won’t feel so bad when they forget about me. Not to mention it will always be some strange for them.

    I met Paul Hogan once in a public bathroom. He looked at me and said, “You call that a penis?”

  41. I am also very curious as to what kind of party they are at where there are endless counts of beds laying around.

  42. @HeSaidWhat There are a lot of clubs out there now that have that theme… But I would steer clear of them… If you took a black light to those beds I’m sure you’d vomit!

  43. I’m not saying that dog in the first pic _isn’t_ pooping, but it looks to me like he is about to jump in the water, not that he is going to the bathroom. He looks like he’s already been for a swim already. Thus, no need to crop him.

  44. Is that Wilmer Valderrama?

  45. Yeah saucer that’s him. It’s a pic that has been circulating for a while now.

  46. 1) Yes, I too felt horribly saddened and depressed by the poor fat girl. Obviously she got all dressed & purtied up for the party and is still stuck in the corner watching two skanks skank it up.
    2) I came to read the comments expecting to see a bunch of jerks make fun of the poor thing, and instead found that many of you felt the same way. Thanks for proving that not everyone on Teh Internetz is a jerk.

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